I suppose I should explain my absence.
You see, it all begins with Matt.
It was the strangest, most cryptic Facebook message, but Matt messages me about helping him sell a pilot.
I am never one to turn down an opportunity after vetting, so I agreed to meet him for a cocktail at The Standard pool, the same pool visited by Samantha and Carrie in SaTC.
This was last summer.
Matt tells me he’s aware of the show I produce, Don’t Tell My Mother, where actors, writers, and comedians share stories they’d NEVER want their mothers to hear. It’s actually so much more than that, but I won’t pitch you here. You just have to suffer through a slight plug: Check out our new website, it’s so beautiful! donttellmymother.com
Matt also said he read my blog and loved it. He wanted to work together and thought it would make sense. Now I know we’ve all heard the story of a seedy Hollywood producer seducing empty 20 year-old expats from Nebraska with hollow promises – but this wasn’t like that. Neither of us played either of those roles. We simply shared an overwhelming drive, driven by a relentless passion, to succeed in our Hollywood aspirations. Matt is an earnest hustler and his belief in me induced my belief in him. Plus I’m from Texas.
Well, the pilot ended up being a really cool celebrity round table show called Dine & Dash, starring Common, Kate Walsh, Dermott Mulroney, Lucy Lawless, and Joe Carnahan. The legal road to becoming a co-producer to the current pitching journey has since engendered a great friendship with Matt I’ve come to value.
Then – we met again the next day, after I watched the pilot. He told me that I was good. He asked me what I was waiting for and told me to write this idea that had been swimming around my brain like the guests in The Standard’s pool.
His words echoed into the fall. In September, I was fortunate enough to vacation with my hubby in Mykonos. There, I voraciously read 3 books, all of which were so well-written, I felt passionately inspired. Matt’s words stuck with me, Velcroed themselves to my hands, until I decided: he was write. (Get it? ;P)
Until that point, I thought myself a student. I thought it was important to read and glean life experiences and wisdom. Then I realized, shit. I’ve lived all over the world. I done traveled Europe and the Middle East for 2 years. I had a complicated military romance under the reign of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell. Plus, I did my homework: I read from other writers.
I decided it was time. It was time to jettison laziness and procrastination and write. Write, dammit!
So, I wrote. and wrote.
Soon the story was no longer floating. It was a giant wave crashing down that consumed me. I wrote this kind of urban fairy tale set in an entrainment agency. It was a strangely cathartic experience to interpret the past, my own experiences this way. I regret to say I became a lame hermit, inclined more to pull away from society to tell the story.
But here’s the other thing – during the time I entered this determined daze, the company I work for – you know where I work to actually live and luckily love – was ingested by a top 3 Hollywood talent agency. I quicklyI transferred offices and teams to join this new world. It all seemed perfectly aligned. The merger greatly increased my workload and before I knew it, I was on set with Queen Latifah and on tour with Pitbull and Enrique Iglesias. Our office was flown to NYC for our holiday party. My life quickly became very surreal, very quickly.
Meanwhile, I maintained my friendship with Matt and not only began pitching Dine & Dash, I also began assisting on other projects with him.
Back in that tumultuous September, I also took a meeting with another friend who happened to be a very successful TV producer for advice on my Matt project. The meeting went well, but he later asked if I would want to work on a development project task force he was putting together.
It felt like serendipity was knocking on my door. I quickly acquiesced and found myself working with this personal trainer/development executive assistant and gay reality star. We began shooting TV sizzles and concepting new unscripted formats. We have become a quirky group of TV-loving gay men hoping to make it together. It’s so charming and again, the world surreal pops up.
Well, for whatever reason, I couldn’t stop writing this book. Even if I tried, it poured out. Yes. I said it. I began writing a book.
I’ve since finished that book.
I’ve since edited that book.
I find myself at this strange, scary new chapter where I will now query my books to literary agents, hoping desperately my words connect with my recipients. It’s terrifying, but also freeing. (But mostly terrifying – what if you send it to all the agents? ALL? And no one wants it? Could you really try all over again with a new book, new concept? – Answer is yes.) Alas – this is a journey not chosen, but assigned. Writers write out of need.
That’s currently where we are at now.
I’ve begun mapping out the sequel to this book, but have also promised myself to come up for air and be conscious- present. I choose to seek amazing experiences and deepen friendships.
This year has been the most exciting yet and I welcome this new journey.
So I apologize for my absence. And to my friends, I apologize for my inability to communicate completely what was going on. In some senses, I didn’t want to tell people about this project until it was completed. I know I’m terrible at writing back and texting – but just call me! Call. It’s so much more personal.
I won’t start on that soapbox.
More on more…. later. ;)